Sufferings – The Blessings in Disguise

It’s 2011, a fine day in the season of Christmas. I am busy with the youth activities of my church for the Christmas Eve and New Year’s Celebration. I am 21 and I am waiting for my graduation results to be out. Everything is going as planned. By the age of  23, I will have a six figured salary and by 25, will have my own house and eventually at the age of 26, I will finally get settled. I was all prepared with goals to touch the sky and dreams to create history.

Even though I am involved in the church youth activities, the thirst for Christ is almost equal to negligible. I am walking a path which even though starts as a Christian, but would reach to a destination of eternal death. Yes!! A namesake Christian. That’s what you can call me, a 21-year-old boy carrying 2 masks. One, as a boy who loves God and the other, who loves the world. And to be really very honest, I was more inclined towards the second one. But God, knowing my plans and with a little smirk on his face declared, For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).

That evening, I am practising for the Christmas celebration, I got a call from the Laboratory (that same morning I gave my blood for testing, as my BP suddenly rose). They said I need to give them blood sample once again as they found something unusual. Now I am confused. A healthy young boy, with no medical history, never ever been admitted in the hospital, can have any health issue? They said, it is probably a technical mistake but however just to confirm it they will undergo the test again and I would need to give them the sample again. Well, I can do that, and with one one of my close friend in the church, I went to the lab. They took my samples, we waited for 20 – 30 mins and finally the result is out.

Not going into the medical terms, I was diagnosed with Kidney Failure. Both my kidneys were performing very poor and that I would immediately need to consult a Nephrologist. I was clueless, confused, scared not knowing what to do. My friend asked me to go home and leave the Christmas activity for the others to handle and he dropped me at my home. Everything was shattered!! My dreams, my goals, my life is now not in my control, it’s a mess. How did I end up like this? I started looking back to understand how did my kidneys go so weak?? I only had boiled water, drinking cold drinks was very occasional. Not sure of anything, I end up on the dialysis bed.

Now I am a guy who has a graduation certificate on one hand, and Chronic Kidney Disorder report in the other, undergoing dialysis thrice a week. A guy who weighed 65 kgs., now weighs only 56 kgs. I started growing weak, couldn’t work the corporate 9 – 5 jobs. My plans are now down the drain. I am just trying to survive each day whereas my friends around are getting big breakthroughs in their careers.

It’s 2012 and once again a Christmas season. My condition is miserable I am on a ventilator due to sudden breathlessness and I couldn’t breathe (After the emergence of Covid, the condition of breathlessness is pretty clear to many people). Doctors said the condition is complicated but I am stable. I am in my unconscious state not knowing if I am going to make it to 2013.  Fortunately, I regained my consciousness, but still on ventilator. Chances are good, I may see 2013 after all.

Fast forward (after years of sufferings and pain, both physical and mental) to 2021. Now, I am physically healthy as I underwent kidney transplant. Things are not as I wanted. I am 31 and my career just started, I couldn’t buy a house as I planned and I am still unmarried. But now, all I see is His mighty grace. My faith in Christ is unhindered and my thirst for him is inexplicable. All these years and mostly because of this pandemic, a thousand fell at my side, ten thousand at my right hand, but it(death) did not come near me (Psalms 91:7).

I am the same person, who thought he won’t be seeing 2013 and by God’s mighty grace, I am in 2021, safe and secure. I sometimes, look back and imagine, what if I never had this disease, how would my life go? Maybe my life would have been successful in career, full of so called “corporate parties” but a failure in my spiritual life. What good will it be for me to gain the whole world, yet forfeit my soul? Or what can I give in exchange for my soul? (Matthew 16:26)

This brings me to another thought. Were those sufferings really a suffering to me?? If I had not been through all my health problems, would I ever have known God like I know him now? Then, would I ever have been saved? If not, then isn’t my sufferings a blessing in disguise?? A blessing to save me from the eternal death and hell? A blessing with a promise to eternal life? A blessing where I am made strong in Christ!!

So, as you count on your blessings, count of your sufferings too, because your sufferings are the blessings in disguise!!